Holy Cow! We're having a Baby!

We had an ultrasound the other day. WOW! Makes me smile just thinking about it. Seeing that perfectly formed little person moving around in there is pretty awesome. We could see his/her brain, his/her heart beating, even the four chambers of the heart! It's too early to tell whether we're having a girl or a boy, but the professionals could pick out other internal organs even though  Little Person Henry  is only about 4 inches long. Amazing!

My wife and I are expecting our first child. Those of you who have already experienced this probably remember the emotions: fear, uncertainty, anticipation,and excitement, that all first-time parents experience. Now its our turn. We are having so much fun thinking about how we'll raise our child, looking for the perfect name, wondering if it's gonna be a girl or a boy, debating parenting strategies, planning the future (Yeah, we know that's kinda silly but we can't help it.). We spend lots of time talking about what life will be like when the little one arrives. We're 16 weeks in and it's starting to sink in I think.

Honestly, thinking about being a dad is pretty scary. There's a person who's going to be counting on me to protect them, provide for their needs, teach them how to live life. On the other hand, I'm really looking forward to the challenge of being a father to the tiny person who is joining our family. What a privilege it is to guide a youngster on their journey to adulthood. I hope I never lose the sense of wonder and responsibility I feel right now.

I wonder what the experienced parents in our lives would say to us. I would love to know more about what they experienced as they anticipated their first child. I suppose its an odyssey everyone has to take on their own, but it seems like it would be so enriching to hear other people talk about what it was like for them to make the transition from being just two to three or more.

This experience is so deeply moving that sharing it with others will help us connect with people in a powerful way. Sharing these life moments involves a level of vulnerability that can build a bridge between people that would otherwise have very little in common. I wonder how it would change our world if we would take the risk of opening up to others our hopes and fears connected to this and other life changing events in our lives.

What would you say about your passage from couple to parents?  Feel free to leave a comment, brief or lengthy, in the comments below.

Would You Rather....?

Let's play a round of  "Would You Rather". Perhaps you've never heard of the game. It's a great party game that requires you to pick between equally undesirable situations and share with your friends the reasons for your choice. It's a little more complicated than that, but you get the idea. Today's topic: Would you rather have a serious illness, deadly and painful but curable, or a chronic illness, painful, incurable, life altering? If you stood at a fork in the road and had to choose one path or the other which would you take?

The one could kill you. Soon. You could be cured. It's gonna be painful, and expensive, but you have a 50-50 chance of making it. The other will be with you the rest of your life. It's gonna hurt. Bad. You won't die from it, at least not in the next couple of years probably.

Not much of a choice is it? If you've experienced one do you wish it had been the other? If neither you nor a loved one has experienced either which would you pick? It's an impossible choice.

Millions of people have the choice made for them. And they often display incredible strength and grace in the midst of it. This blog post is a tribute to those who are living, or dying, with an illness they didn't choose. They display courage, class, and dignity. Only those closest to them know the pain they feel, the frustration they experience, the fierceness with which they fight. They can teach us so much about perseverance and determination.

To honor these unsung heroes leave your own tribute in the comment section below. Thank you.

*photo from FreeDigitalPhoto.net

Afraid of Fear?

Our Illustrious President, Franklin D. Roosevelt famously said "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself." I doubt this is the first time you have encountered this maxim. You may not have known its origin but I would be surprised if any American reached adulthood without hearing or reading this proverb may times. But is it true? Should we fear FEAR? Isn't fear good sometimes? Can't you use fear for motivation? Have you ever heard someone say they have a "healthy" fear of something?

Fear can definitely be a bad thing.  It can make you do the wrong thing or cause you to fail to do the right thing. Hit and Run accidents are caused by fear. If there is no fear there is no "run". Bullying works because of fear. Fear is a key ingredient of various other forms of manipulation. Fear is BAD!

Sometimes fear is good. It keeps people from all manner of stupid behaviors. It keeps most of us from cliff diving, base jumping, even skydiving. It is what makes roller coasters and horror films fun. So why is fear something we should fear?

Maybe we should just eye it warily...... Don't let fear stop you from trying something new. Don't let fear stop you from fighting for what is right. Don't let fear stop you from reaching out to people who may take advantage of you. Do let it keep you from doing something you are not ready for. Let it push you to adequate preparation. Enjoy the excitement and exhilaration that comes from facing fear head-on. Be the hero. Wear the badge of courage.
 

You're Just Weird!

I'm fascinated by Amish people. I don't really understand them, despite growing up in a faith family that shares roots with the Amish. Many of the thought processes that define how they live are very similar to the ones I was taught growing up in the Mennonite Church. So I'm fascinated. I wonder what my Amish neighbor thinks of me. What does he say about me to his children as they go by in their buggy. Do they even consider me remarkable enough to comment?

There are other people I encounter who are very different from me. The young thug with the sagging pants and exposed boxers is a good example. I know what I think and feel when I see him. What does he think and feel when he sees me? I'm not sure I want to know.

Ever wonder what goes through Donald Trump's mind  when he rubs elbows with regular everyday people on the street? What does he really think of you? (I assume you are a regular person. Why would an irregular person read this blog?) Consider your favorite celebrity. What do they think and feel when they move about among the general population? Do they wonder what it would be like to not be a celebrity. Can they empathize with the "fry guy" at McDonald's? Do they even have a clue about the lifestyle of people who don't enjoy nearly unlimited finances?

Ever spend much time around homeless people? There are different kinds you know. Some of them are mentally ill. Some are just down on their luck. Some are kids who ran away from home. What emotions attach themselves to the mental images you have of each of these?

Did you ever wonder if your opinions of who these people are inside are accurate? Here's a novel idea. When you interact with people who are different from you spend time discovering things you agree on. You might be surprised at what you discover. It will help you be civil when you discover your differences.

What do you think of this idea? Have any good stories about encounters with people very different from you?

Despising the Commonplace

Have you heard the proverb "Familiarity breeds contempt."? There's a lot of truth in that old adage. It happens in our work, at home, in entertainment, transportation, recreation, hobbies, at church, in our communities. Sadly, this tendency of ours is robbing us of so much joy! 

There is joy built into the landscape around us. Doubt me? How do you feel when you take the time to watch the sun settle into the western horizon? You can't watch a sunset without a feeling of contentedness, peace washing over you. There's something healing about it. 

There is healing in the dawn as well. If it's been a while since you've watched the sun come up, set your alarm for half an hour before sunrise. Go somewhere with a view of  the eastern horizon and watch your world awaken. These, my friend, are powerful, joyful, healing moments.

The sun rises and sets every day. Every sunrise, sunset is beautiful, and yet, most of us seldom experience the wonder of watching it happen. Such a simple, every day kind of thing we take for granted because its always there. These simple, everyday blessings surround us. But we are so prone to dissatisfaction, discontent, and  unhappiness that we fail to notice.

Consider college football. I LOVE college football! When the last Bowl Game is played in January I feel a little sad because I know my beloved sport will disappear for the next eight months or so. Then, as summer begins to draw to a close I feel the excitement begin to build as talk of rankings and scheduled opponents begins to swirl. When that glorious Opening Day arrives, all the world (well a lot of people anyway) is abuzz with the anticipation of watching their favorite team compete and hopefully win the day! None of this would mean much, or be nearly as fun, if college football happened every week. You see? We lose our appreciation for the familiar. 

I remember going to a new church, with  a Pastor I hadn't heard preach before. This guy was good! I didn't get bored, or feel sleepy, or watch the clock to see how soon the torture would be over. I attended week after week, month after month, and something happened. The sermons were not nearly as interesting as they used to be.   I found myself getting sleepy, my mind wandering. One Sunday morning I found myself watching the clock! Then one morning someone else took the Pastor's place on the stage. Wow! I wish this guy would speak more often! He's much more interesting than the regular guy! Have you ever experienced something like this? It's not that the Pastor lost his skill. He simply became familiar to you.

The same thing happens with all of life. A new car loses its luster because we drive it every day. You need new equipment for your hobby. Is something wrong with your old equipment? Remember how pleased you were when you first bought it? Do you still think your community is the wonderful place it was when you first joined? Has it really changed so much or has it just become too familiar?

There is beauty, joy, wonder, all around me. I hope I never fail to live my days with gratitude.